for someone who tries to travel as much as i do… i sure do run into a lot of problems. so here i am at the san francisco airport, sitting at uncork’d (my usual pre- vancouver wine bar), drinking a glass of husch, a gewurztraimer from the 2023 anderson valley which i don’t love, waiting for my flight, about to tell you stories from my airport past.

to make it easy we’ll start with today.

i booked my annual summer trip to hang out with all the cool kids of vancouver about a month ago. great airfare, great weather, great everything. it took me two days to fully pack because i didn’t want to overpack but also not forget anything. after running through all my lists over and over again until 10pm last night. what could go wrong? amy and i discussed like a week prior that because of the sfo incident of last canada trip (we’ll get to that one soon enough) that we would leave up to maybe like THREE hours in advance. flight departed at 6:45… we were gonna leave around 3:30ish. now… what could go wrong like i asked before??? hmmmmm MAYBE I SET MY ALARM FOR 3PM AND NOT AM because i took a nap yesterday and set an alarm for 5:45pm and was careless enough to not double check that small little detail. so i wake up at 5:30 in HORROR because my flight boards in less than an hour and the eta from my house to the airport was 55 minutes. close, i could’ve made it, but it was too close to risk. so i shook amy awake which is very unlike me because i HATE waking people up, especially if i have to touch/shake them… not my thing. and she starts troubleshooting and i go upstairs to my mom’s room to go figure this out because what else is a girl to do but turn to her mom in crisis? all of the flights that i was looking at to leave today or tomorrow to vancouver were all $400+ and i really didn’t want to have to pay for that because that alone was double my round trip airfare. i was so desperate that i was ready to book a flair air flight and i’ve barely even heard of the girl so i could’ve been scammed or killed who knows. but thank GOD for united customer service because they got me on the next flight out QUICK, no fees… NOTHING. and now i’m at the airport writing this blog to you.

regardless there were a lot of silver linings to this flight. like if we left at 3:30 as planned, we wouldn’t be able to get chick-fil-a breakfast which i was itching for because i’ll be on a hiatus for a week. also in california you’re not allowed to serve alcohol before 6am and i get really bad travel anxiety so sometimes a glass of wine will save me. so had i come early as hell i wouldn’t be sipping this boof wine right now. silver linings baby, silver linings. not to forget amy and i adopted edible and fredrick the caribbean cows on the run from chick-fil-a.

typically all my airport horror stories have to do with sfo and this one was no different. i told this story on my euro spring blog (which as of right now isn’t released yet) but i will say it here again. no matter how much i travel i cannot escape the anxiety and feelings of doom. i was perfectly fine up until we parked and stated to make our way to the actual airport when all of a sudden i started just getting really anxious but i just kept it pushing because i’m a big girl. but once we got to the check in counter and we were scanning our passports i started getting really bad hot flashes, but once again i kept it pushing. but once we got past security i was sweating out my clothes and my stomach was hard as a rock and CHURNING. so there i was sitting outside of the lounges in the international terminal fighting for my life. but as i was crouched down, my stomach dropped and i was cured of all my issues. i really have no idea what my problem is because i really don’t think that this is normal. but per usual i was cured with a hibiscus cucumber marg and chicken teriyaki sandwich from gott’s.

and now for the one you’ve been waiting for… my sfo trip from hell. all of the pre-vancouver trips have all started out with straight DELUSION. i’m always so happy to go because duh who wouldn’t and this time was no different because i was taking beau up for his 19th birthday (canadian drinking age) and i always allow myself to stupidly think “oh i do this trip all the time… nothings gonna go wrong!!!” boy have i been wrong the past two times i’ve made the trip up by myself (cause when i went with mom and nani it was a breeze). so once again amy slept over because she’s my sfo ride ALWAYS and my flight was domestic because i was flying to bellingham not vancouver (which for some reason is still domestic) so we were gonna leave a little closer to departure time but still leave ourselves some wiggle room. so if my flight was at 6:30, we left at 4:15. when we checked the eta to the airport too it was only like 50 minutes or less so we were smooth sailing. but then we get to the bay bridge. completely stopped traffic. not actually but everyone was moving no faster than 2mph. we made it to the airport right in the knick of time but when i head up to the alaska baggage check in… it won’t let me check my bag in so this really nice dude comes over and is like oh let me help you and tells me to go to their customer service counter so i go, wait, and then they send me back to the original dude who sends me right back but this time they actually try to help me. but bad news. i can get on the same flight, but it would be the next day. so i sit down and weigh my options. one way airfare to vancouver on aircanada is about $500 but i can’t miss this trip. i have to go. so i book it and then i book it to the international terminal. i run through the whole terminal looking for the united counter…. its not there. so i find the closest airport worker and they tell me i have to get on a tram and head across the airport. so there i am once again… booking it. i go to the first united check in desk i see almost in tears with only one family ahead of me. they look back and see me in the midst of my struggle and let the gate agent immediately start helping me. once i tell her i’m going to vancouver she informs me i’m once again at the wrong counter and i need to make my way down the hall a little bit more. i once again make it to the check in counter in the knick of time. the line is as long as it could possibly be in your worst nightmare. and literally one minute before bag check in cut off i make it to the check in kiosk. it won’t let me check my bag in. i’m begging and pleading with the help desk that i’m literally on time, late, but still on time. she tells me there’s nothing she can do for me but i think she felt bad for me and she was able to route me through denver on a layover and get me into vancouver around 10pm. i take it. i have no other options. i was supposed to be there at 9am. 11 hour delay but whatever works. i have… probably 6 hours to kill inside of sfo so what do i do? go the the bar, order chicken sliders and a cocktail (fire btw, i think the restaurant is tagged on tastingwithtata instagram somewhere), and turn on my comfort movie: twisters. one cocktail quickly turns to 6, 1 of them i got for free. and before i knew it i was talking to everyone. i made a friend from i think germany… he’s cool we still follow each other. i beefed with a little boy. and yeah that’s really all i could tell you about that so. but the nightmare doesn’t stop there. i finally make my way to denver. but the airport is massive so i’m taking trams trying to find my way to my gate. on the bright side though it was probably a 2 hour layover so i definitely could’ve taken it a lot easier than i did. but i’m a stressful girl. i make my flight no issue, thank god but if you know me you know i get motion sickness like no other. for some reason even when i was hammered my flight was smooth sailing. sober??? fighting for my life in the middle seat between two people around my age so… embarrassing. i’m moving around, tucking my head between my legs, and finally as we land i throw up. i try to make it in the bag but a little bit made its way out on to my jeans. god i felt so disgusting. so close to the end of the flight too. i don’t know how so many things could go wrong in such a short period of time, but i made it through and beau and i had an amazing trip (at least in my book.) all the pain was worth it.

now before this i had my beef with the dallas airports. nothing too serious, just my own stupidity. the summer of 2022 i drove from the inland empire to texas with my ex and when it was time for me to leave dallas and go home… i didn’t want to get out of bed. so i cried and cried and cried… and missed my flight. it was the first time i had ever missed a flight and it really destroyed my reputation because before that i had never once missed a flight, and here i am now with 4 missed flights under my belt. so there i was at dfw almost breaking down in tears every time i saw a man in uniform because i wanted to stay with my man in uniform. sad sad times. but when they rebooked me i had to go to san diego and i sat next to this lady from vacaville who was telling me that a tomato delivery truck spilt all over i-80 and left the highway red. strange things to remember, but that’s what i remember. and my last dallas horror story is also at no fault other than my own but, it happened. once again i was visiting that same ex in dallas a year later for my sisters baby shower. this time we swore up and down that we were gonna make it on time. and that we did…but to the wrong airport. so pro tip, if you’re flying out of dallas make sure you know the difference between DAL and DFW.

and finally for my first airport horror story: the lax bathroom demon. on the flight home from my first trip to fiji we had a layover at lax. and after sitting on a plane for like 16 hours… it was nice to be able to stretch my legs out and use not 1/4 of the bathrooms shared by the 300 people on that flight. so i went to the bathroom and as i’m sitting there relieving myself when all of a sudden a seven year old blonde bitch kicks the door open on me and we just stare at each other. she doesn’t close the door… nothing. just staring. and then she runs away. so i’m sitting there.. exposed, in the lax bathroom at the ripe age of like 13. very humbling.

in conclusion, i have beef with the airport. we need to figure out our issues and just live in peace with one another. we both know it’s not the last we’re gonna see of each other. and also if you have any remedies for travel anxiety or anxiety in general please let a girl know.

love you always,

xoxo

tata